Tartary, a tailor who had a pretty wife, whom he affectionately
loved, and by whom he was beloved with reciprocal tenderness. One
day while he was at work, a little hunch-back seated himself at
the shop door and began to sing, and play upon a tabor. The
tailor was pleased with his performance, and resolved to take him
to his house to entertain his wife: "This little fellow," said
he, "will divert us both this evening." He accordingly invited
him, and the other readily accepted the invitation: so the tailor
shut up his shop, and carried him home. Immediately after their
arrival the tailor's wife placed before them a good dish of fish;
but as the little man was eating, he unluckily swallowed a bone,
which, notwithstanding all that the tailor and his wife could do,
choked him. This accident greatly alarmed them both, dreading, if
the magistrates should hear of it, that they would be punished as
murderers. However, the husband devised a scheme to get rid of
the corpse. He reflected that a Jewish doctor lived just by, and
having formed his plan, his wife and he took the corpse, the one
by the feet and the other by the head, and carried it to the
physician's house. They knocked at the door, from which a steep
flight of stairs led to his chamber. The servant maid came down
without any light, and opening the door, asked what they wanted.
"Have the goodness," said the tailor, "to go up again, and tell
your master we have brought him a man who is very ill, and wants
his advice. Here," continued he, putting a piece of money into
her hand, "give him that beforehand, to convince him that we do
not mean to impose." While the servant was gone up to inform her
master, the tailor and his wife hastily conveyed the hunchbacked
corpse to the head of the stairs, and leaving it there, hurried
away.
In the mean time, the maid told the doctor, that a man and woman
waited for him at the door, desiring he would come down and look
at a sick man whom they had brought with them, and clapped into
his hand the money she had received. The doctor was transported
with joy; being paid beforehand, he thought it must needs be a
good patient, and should not be neglected. "Light, light," cried
he to the maid; "follow me quickly." As he spoke, he hastily ran
towards the head of the stairs without waiting for a light, and
came against the corpse with so much violence that he
precipitated it to the bottom, and had nearly fallen with it.
"Bring me a light," cried he to the maid; "quick, quick." At last
she brought one, and he went down stairs with her; but when he
saw that what he had kicked down was a dead man, he was so
frightened, that he invoked Moses, Aaron, Joshua, Esdras, and all
the other prophets of his nation. "Unhappy man that I am," said
he, "why did I attempt to come without a light! I have killed the
poor fellow who was brought to me to be cured: doubtless I am the
cause of his death, and unless Esdras's ass come to assist me, I
am ruined: Mercy on me, they will be here out of hand, and drag
me out of my house for a murderer."
Notwithstanding the perplexity and confusion into which he was
thrown, he had the precaution to shut his door, for fear any one
passing by should observe the accident of which he reckoned
himself to be the author. He then took the corpse into his wife's
chamber, who was ready to swoon at the sight. "Alas," cried she,
"we are utterly ruined and undone, unless we can devise some
expedient to get the corpse out of our house this night. If we
harbour it till morning we are lost. What a deplorable misfortune
is this! What have you done to kill this man?" "That is not now
the question," replied the Jew; "our business at present is, to
find a remedy for the evil which threatens us."
The doctor and his wife consulted how to dispose of the corpse
that night. The doctor racked his brain in vain, he could not
think of any stratagem to relieve his embarrassment; but his
wife, who was more fertile in invention, said, "A thought is just
come into my head; let us carry the corpse to the terrace of our
house, and throw it down the chimney of our Mussulmaun
neighbour."
This Mussulmaun was one of the sultan's purveyors for furnishing
oil, butter, and articles of a similar nature, and had a magazine
in his house, where the rats and mice made prodigious havoc.
The Jewish doctor approving the proposed expedient, the wife and
he took the little hunch-back up to the roof of the house; and
clapping ropes under his arm-pits, let him down the chimney into
the purveyor's chamber so dexterously that he stood upright
against the wall, as if he had been alive. When they found he had
reached the bottom, they pulled up the ropes, and left the corpse
in that posture. They were scarcely got down into their chamber,
when the purveyor, who had just returned from a wedding feast,
went into his room, with a lanthorn in his hand. He was not a
little surprised to discover a man standing in his chimney; but
being a stout fellow, and apprehending him to be a thief, he took
up a stick, and making straight up to the hunch-back, "Ah!" said
he, "I thought the rats and mice ate my butter and tallow; but it
is you who come down the chimney to rob me? However, I think you
will have no wish to come here again." Upon this he attacked
hunch-back, and struck him several times with his stick. The
corpse fell down flat on the ground, and the purveyor redoubled
his blows. But, observing that the body did not move, he stood a
little time to regard it; and then, perceiving it to be dead,
fear succeeded his anger. "Wretched man that I am," said he,
"what have I done! I have killed a man; alas, I have carried my
revenge too far. Good God, unless thou pity me my life is gone!
Cursed, ten thousand times accursed, be the fat and the oil that
occasioned me to commit so criminal an action." He stood pale and
thunderstruck; he fancied he already saw the officers come to
drag him to condign punishment, and could not tell what
resolution to take.
The sultan of Casgar's purveyor had never noticed the little
man's hump-back when he was beating him, but as soon as he
perceived it, he uttered a thousand imprecations against him.
"Ah, thou cursed hunch-back," cried he, "thou crooked wretch,
would to God thou hadst robbed me of all my fat, and I had not
found thee here. I then should not have been thrown into this
perplexity on account of this and thy vile hunch. Ye stars that
twinkle in the heavens, give your light to none but me in this
dangerous juncture." As soon as he had uttered these words, he
took the crooked corpse upon his shoulders, and carried it to the
end of the street, where he placed it in an upright posture
against a shop; he then returned without once looking behind him.
A few minutes before day-break, a Christian merchant, who was
very rich, and furnished the sultan's palace with various
articles, having sat up all night at a debauch, happened to come
from his house in this direction on his way to the bath. Though
he was intoxicated, he was sensible that the night was far spent,
and that the people would soon be called to morning prayers; he
therefore quickened his pace to get to the bath in time, lest
some Mussulmaun, in his way to the mosque, should meet him and
carry him to prison for a drunkard. When he came to the end of
the street, he had occasion to stop by the shop where the
sultan's purveyor had put the hunch-backed corpse; which being
jostled by him, tumbled upon the merchant's back. The merchant
thinking he was attacked by a robber, knocked it down, and after
redoubling his blows, cried out "Thieves!"
The outcry alarmed the watch, who came up immediately, and
finding a Christian beating a Mussulmaun (for hump-back was of
our religion), "What reason have you," said he, "to abuse a
Mussulmaun in this manner?" "He would have robbed me," replied
the merchant, "and jumped upon my back in order to take me by the
throat." "If he did," said the watch, "you have revenged yourself
sufficiently; come, get off him." At the same time he stretched
out his hand to help little hump-back up, but observing he was
dead, "Oh!" said he, "is it thus that a Christian dares to
assassinate a Mussulmaun?" So saying, he laid hold of the
Christian, and carried him to the house of the officer of the
police, where he was kept till the judge was stirring, and ready
to examine him. In the mean time, the Christian merchant became
sober, and the more he reflected upon his adventure, the less
could he conceive how such slight blows of his fist could have
killed the man.
The judge having heard the report of the watch, and viewed the
corpse, which they had taken care to bring to his house,
interrogated the Christian merchant, who could not deny the
crime, though he had not committed it. But the judge considering
that little hump-back belonged to the sultan, for he was one of
his buffoons, would not put the Christian to death till he knew
the sultan's pleasure. For this end he went to the palace, and
acquainted the sultan with what had happened; and received this
answer: "I have no mercy to show to a Christian who kills a
Mussulmaun." Upon this the judge ordered a stake to be prepared,
and sent criers all over the city to proclaim that they were
about to impale a Christian for killing a Mussulmaun.
At length the merchant was brought to the place of execution; and
the executioner was about to do his duty, when the sultan's
purveyor pushed through the crowd, calling to him to stop for
that the Christian had not committed the murder, but he himself
had done it. Upon that, the officer who attended the execution
began to question the purveyor, who told him every circumstance
of his having killed the little hunchback, and how he had
conveyed his corpse to the place where the Christian merchant had
found it. "You were about," added he, "to put to death an
innocent person; for how can he be guilty of the death of a man
who was dead before he touched him? It is enough for me to have
killed a Mussulmaun without loading my conscience with the death
of a Christian who is not guilty."
The sultan of Casgar's purveyor having publicly charged himself
with the death of the little hunchbacked man, the officer could
do no less than execute justice on the merchant. "Let the
Christian go," said he to the executioner, "and impale this man
in his stead, since it appears by his own confession that he is
guilty." Thereupon the executioner released the merchant, and
seized the purveyor; but just as he was going to impale him, he
heard the voice of the Jewish doctor, earnestly intreating him to
suspend the execution, and make room for him to approach.
When he appeared before the judge, "My lord," said he, "this
Mussulmaun you are going to execute is not guilty. I am the
criminal. Last night a man and a woman, unknown to me, came to my
door with a sick man; my maid went and opened it without a light,
and received from them a piece of money with a commission to come
and desire me, in their name, to step down and look at the
patient. While she was delivering her message, they conveyed the
sick person to the stair-head, and disappeared. I went, without
staying till my servant had lighted a candle, and in the dark
happened to stumble upon the sick person, and kick him down
stairs. At length I saw he was dead, and that it was the crooked
Mussulmaun whose death you are now about to avenge. My wife and I
took the corpse, and, after conveying it up to the roof of the
purveyor, our next neighbour, whom you were going to put to death
unjustly, let it down the chimney into his chamber. The purveyor
finding it in his house, took the little man for a thief, and
after beating him concluded he had killed him. But that it was
not so you will be convinced by this my deposition; I am the sole
author of the murder; and though it was committed undesignedly, I
am resolved to expiate my crime, that I may not have to charge
myself with the death of two Mussulmauns."
The chief justice being persuaded that the Jewish doctor was the
murderer, gave orders to the executioner to seize him and release
the purveyor. Accordingly the doctor was just going to be
impaled, when the tailor appeared, crying to the executioner to
hold his hand, and make room for him, that he might come and make
his confession to the chief judge. Room being made, "My lord,"
said he, "you have narrowly escaped taking away the lives of
three innocent persons; but if you will have the patience to hear
me, I will discover to you the real murderer of the crook backed
man. If his death is to be expiated by another, that must be
mine. Yesterday, towards the evening, as I was at work in my
shop, and was disposed to be merry, the little hunch-back came to
my door half-drunk, and sat down. He sung a little, and so I
invited him to pass the evening at my house. He accepted the
invitation and went in with me. We sat down to supper and I gave
him a plate of fish; but in eating, a bone stuck in his throat,
and though my wife and I did our utmost to relieve him, he died
in a few minutes. His death afflicted us extremely, and for fear
of being charged with it, we carried the corpse to the Jewish
doctor's house and knocked. The maid came. and opened the door; I
desired her to go up again and ask her master to come down and
give his advice to a sick person whom we had brought along with
us; and withal, to encourage him, I charged her to give him a
piece of money, which I put into her hand. When she was gone, I
carried the hunch-back up stairs, and laid him upon the uppermost
step, and then my wife and I made the best of our way home. The
doctor coming, threw the corpse down stairs, and concluded
himself to be the author of his death. This being the case,"
continued he, "release the doctor, and let me die in his stead."
The chief justice, and all the spectators, wondered at the
strange events which had ensued upon the death of the little
hunch-back. "Let the Jewish doctor go," said the judge, "and
seize the tailor, since he confesses the crime. It is certain
this history is very uncommon, and deserves to be recorded in
letters of gold." The executioner having dismissed the doctor
prepared to impale the tailor.
While the executioner was making ready to impale the tailor, the
sultan of Casgar, wanting the company of his crooked jester,
asked where he was; and one of his officers told him; "The hunch-
back, Sir, whom you inquire after, got drunk last night, and
contrary to his custom slipped out of the palace, and went
strolling about the city, and this morning was found dead. A man
was brought before the chief justice, and charged with the murder
of him; but when he was going to be impaled, up came a man, and
after him another, who took the charge upon themselves and
cleared one another, and the judge is now examining a third, who
gives himself out for the real author of the murder."
Upon this intelligence the sultan of Casgar sent an officer to
the place of execution. "Go," said he, "with all expedition, and
tell the judge to bring the accused persons before me immediately
and bring also the corpse of poor hunch-back, that I may see him
once more." Accordingly the officer went, and happened to arrive
at the place of execution at the very time that the executioner
had laid his hands upon the tailor. He called aloud to him to
suspend the execution. The executioner knowing the officer, did
not dare to proceed, but released the tailor; and then the
officer acquainted the judge with the sultan's pleasure. The
judge obeyed, and went directly to the palace accompanied by the
tailor, the Jewish doctor, and the Christian merchant; and made
four of his men carry the hunch-backed corpse along with him.
When they appeared in the sultan's presence, the judge threw
himself at the prince's feet and after recovering himself, gave
him a faithful relation of what he knew of the story of the
hunch-backed man. The story appeared so extraordinary to the
sultan, that he ordered his own historian to write it down with
all its circumstances. Then addressing himself to the audience;
"Did you ever hear," said he, "such a surprising event as has
happened on the account of my little crooked buffoon?" The
Christian merchant, after falling down, and touching the earth
with his forehead, spoke as follows: "Most puissant monarch, I
know a story yet more astonishing than this; if your majesty will
give me leave, I will relate it. The circumstances are such, that
no one can hear them without emotion." "Well," said the sultan,
"you have my permission:" and the merchant went on as follows: